!!! Safety first !!!
Would you like to see the movie? Not so fast. This is not gonna be your standard, popcorn-movie experience. Weaker ones may need diapers, some may puke their mouth full, some may shit their brains out. Remember what your mama said: "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger". Only the brave and strong ones may experience full flavor of the Opium Ocean. Only prepared ones will be able to smell petrol fumes, blood, and hardcore tire burnouts. Only the chosen ones will reach a full high of the movie experience. But no one is born strong, you have to prepare. Therefore we put together Opium Ocean safety manual.
Dare to get ready for the ride? Or another one?
Warning! You will not be able to purchase movie tickets without showing a safety examination certificate with your name and your id. More information is coming soon at apsits.com. Please, be patient. Meanwhile, you must follow hashtag #opiumocean and study information on @apsits Instagram.
Would you like to see the movie? Not so fast. This is not gonna be your standard, popcorn-movie experience. Weaker ones may need diapers, some may puke their mouth full, some may shit their brains out. Remember what your mama said: "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger". Only the brave and strong ones may experience full flavor of the Opium Ocean. Only prepared ones will be able to smell petrol fumes, blood, and hardcore tire burnouts. Only the chosen ones will reach a full high of the movie experience. But no one is born strong, you have to prepare. Therefore we put together Opium Ocean safety manual.
Dare to get ready for the ride? Or another one?
Warning! You will not be able to purchase movie tickets without showing a safety examination certificate with your name and your id. More information is coming soon at apsits.com. Please, be patient. Meanwhile, you must follow hashtag #opiumocean and study information on @apsits Instagram.
Opium Ocean safety program is safe.
To assure your premium safety we tested our program on human twins. Peter and Tenis were born on the same day, from the same mother, probably from different fathers. They are totally different characters, therefore - perfect test subjects. Tenis was such a pussy before training. In contrary, Peter was mega hardcore. Peter lives in the countryside in one 3x4m room with his chickens, naked girl posters, and ... Well, this is creepy, but this is fucking real, I swear you. When I once visited him, there was my portrait cut from an old magazine "Kulturas Diena" and attached to the wall between naked boobs. That was so surreal, creepy, and heartwarming. I gave him a small role in the movie so you will meet him later.
Just look how strong, brave and healthy brothers are in a day of graduation from safety program. They even got their humor back and Tenis came up with silly, stupid rime:
"Peter & Tenis,
together we are Penis,
Strong and healthy,
Brutally stealthy."
Aren't you convinced to take your first step too?
To assure your premium safety we tested our program on human twins. Peter and Tenis were born on the same day, from the same mother, probably from different fathers. They are totally different characters, therefore - perfect test subjects. Tenis was such a pussy before training. In contrary, Peter was mega hardcore. Peter lives in the countryside in one 3x4m room with his chickens, naked girl posters, and ... Well, this is creepy, but this is fucking real, I swear you. When I once visited him, there was my portrait cut from an old magazine "Kulturas Diena" and attached to the wall between naked boobs. That was so surreal, creepy, and heartwarming. I gave him a small role in the movie so you will meet him later.
Just look how strong, brave and healthy brothers are in a day of graduation from safety program. They even got their humor back and Tenis came up with silly, stupid rime:
"Peter & Tenis,
together we are Penis,
Strong and healthy,
Brutally stealthy."
Aren't you convinced to take your first step too?
Welcome to the first day of training.
